Just Look at Me Once
by kayla-thebored
Summary: Fire burns brighter in the dark, but why isn't that enough to outshine him? He's always ahead of me. Blocking me from her view. If I did something… anything, would that be enough to have her glance back? Even for a moment. That'd be enough for me. One-Shot KatnissXPeeta in Gale's P.o.V


**Disclaimer: I don't own anything**

I watch her as she laughs and smiles at him. I watch as she hugs him from behind as they walk. I watch as she takes his hand in hers. I watch as she gives him light pecks on his cheek and his lips from time to time. I watch as she loves him.

It hurts me badly. It hurts me to see her so happy, so happy with him. It hurts me that he is the only one that can get that beautiful laugh to escape her lips. It hurts me that he is the only one that can make her grin almost every five seconds. It hurts me to see him hold her against him and feel so right about it.

And as I watch, I can hear my heart breaking as tiny pieces fall down one at a time. And even though it is breaking, I can still hear it pumping against my chest as though it wants to get out and be free. But it doesn't. It just keeps pumping louder and louder.

She looks towards my direction and I quickly hide myself before she spots me. There is a confused look on her face as she searches for something. I see her start to walk towards my direction, but he gently catches her arm.

"What's wrong?" he asks

"Nothing, I just thought I heard something." She answers

I chuckle darkly. Even she can hear my heart breaking.

"I'm sure it's nothing." He says and she nods

They slowly walk around town, their arms linked together. I want nothing more than to reach out to her, to just look at her beautiful face as she shows her amazing smile, her eyes sparkling. I want nothing more than to see her happy with me. And I feel so blinded for all I see is her, in my arms, smiling like no tomorrow.

As I watch her with him, I only wish that she would turn around once again and see me, looking at her. I just wish that she would turn around, and make her heart turn around with her. But that doesn't happen.

I turn away as he leans in closer to her, but even as I turn, I see at the corner of my eye as he kisses her. She doesn't pull away like I hope she would, but instead, she leans in closer which doubles the pain in my heart.

They pull away, looking at each other with big smiles on their faces, their eyes full of love. I feel a pang in my chest. I could love her so much more. So much more than he could. But she doesn't know that. And it's my entire fault she doesn't. I should've told her. I had the perfect chance to tell her, but I didn't, and now I regret it.

I remember as I walked up to her door, ready to knock and tell her how much I loved her when she opened the door, but I couldn't. I looked at the ground, thinking of how much of a wimp I am. I should've looked her in the eyes and told her how much it hurts me to see her with him, how much it hurts just thinking about how he can sleep next to her at night and wake up with her next to him. I should've told her how much I could love her more than he could ever love her. But I didn't. Instead, I turn around. I turned around and walked away.

And because of that, I now have to endure the pain as I watch him wrap his arms around her thin waist while she leans against him.

I don't know what came over me. But in that very second, I start walking towards them, their backs towards me. My pace quickened and I found that her name was trying to escape my lips. I wanted to shout for her, to call her and tell her how I feel. But, when I realize what I'm doing, I stop, exactly 5 meters away from them and catch myself from yelling her name and instead I whisper her name. I whisper her name so softly, even I couldn't hear it. But I did. And she didn't.

I quickly turn around and walk away from them. I wonder, if I was louder, would she have heard me? Would she have seen me?

I look back at them just in time to see her wriggle out of his arms and take his arm in her small hands and starts pulling him into a nearby café. I hesitantly follow them, not sure if I am going to break down soon. But, I couldn't help it and I start following them. I go to the café right across from where they are and order a cup of coffee to calm my nerves.

I watch them talk and laugh together as I drink my coffee, which has not been doing a very good job at calming my nerves. I take another sip as he stands up and walks inside the café, but not without giving her a kiss on the forehead.

I sit up as he disappears in the café leaving her alone. I place my cup on the table and look at her, playing with her fork. This could be my chance. This could be my chance to tell her. But, I wonder, if I asked her to stay come with me for only one day and lay in my arms just like she does with him, just for one day, if she would say yes.

Just a simple yes from her can make me the happiest man, but even if she did say yes, even if she did save me from my misery, she would still leave and then everything will collapse again. Everything will crumble down to the ground, and I will feel all the hurt I felt before.

But sometimes, I wonder, why she chose him over me when we are the same. We are both fighters, both survivors. I can protect her and trust that she watches my back when danger threatens us. We can survive anywhere together. We're both hunters, we are both independent and we have the same blazing fire within us, but why did she not pick me?

The thought lingers in my mind a little longer and when I turn back to her, he is already there, right next to her. I stand up and leave the money on the table. I start to walk away, but I'm stopped when I hear her scream.

My head turns to her as quick as lightning, ready to pounce on him if he had hurt her. But instead, I see her laughing as he carries her of the ground and spin her around in the middle of the street. When he finally sets her down, she walks closer to him, and I wince as her face inches closer to his, but at the very last second, she smirks and turns away, leaving him standing there.

He chuckles and pulls her by the arm and kisses her. Her arms immediately wrap around his neck as he wraps his hands on his waist. Just seeing them like that makes me weak, and my legs suddenly feel like they turned to jell-o and I want nothing more than to collapse on the ground on my knees. It feels like my whole body has stopped and I can't seem to turn around, as though my body wants me to see them like this.

When I do turn around, I run. I don't even look back to see their happy and loving smiles to each other. I just run. I run to the place I am staying for the week and I shut the door behind me. This time, my body does fail and as I press my back against the door, I slide down until I am sitting on the ground.

I stay there for who knows how long, but when I stand up, the horizon has turned dark, the last sliver of sunset disappearing from the sky. I walk to my room and take a hot shower to clear my mind. The shower helps, but the moment I step outside the bathroom, everything crashes into me again. I take a deep breath and walk towards my bedroom window. I look out and I see from afar, the Victor's Village where they are probably in now.

I wonder what she's doing right now. I wonder what they're doing right now. Just thinking of them together kills me inside and I can't do anything about it. Although, even though I couldn't find the words or the courage to tell her, I hope that tonight, when she closes her eyes, she'll realize how much I really care for her. How much I'll love her more than him.

I leave the window and lie down on my own bed and stare at the ceiling, thinking if she will think of me tonight. With the painful images of them together, arms wrapped around each other, and smiling at each other with so much love it feels like they might explode floats around my mind, I start to drift asleep.

But, a second before I am truly pulled into deep sleep, I realize something.

I can't love her more than him.

**Not my best, but I did this rather quickly. But still, I hope you guys like it!**


End file.
